Sometimes I'm surprised by what my job description includes as a speech-language pathologist in the schools. I got enlisted to play Santa for the kindergarten classes. The kids were so cute. I had a little girl run up and give me a hug. When I walked in the hall children followed me. One girl pulled on my beard then started yelling "He's a fake! He's a fake!" Luckily most kids believed.
Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Clause not some bald speech teacher.
At least I'm not really that fat. I had some stuffing to help fill me out.